Jude,
I am writing this very long overdue message to you about your Dad, partly because I didn’t exactly know how to do it, and partly because you’ve probably had so many messages and thoughts to process last year.
I knew your Dad for about 13 years. He was originally my boss, when he lived and worked for Business Objects. He was in Singapore and I was in Tokyo, Japan. Do you know where those places are? Maybe your mom can show you on a map. We ran the ‘partner business’ at the company, talking to people, building a business, making friends and colleagues, having fun, and always trying to look at the good side of life. He helped me learn about doing work well, and with an enthusiasm that would carry forward into other parts of my life. He was never short on good career advice and steadfast support, nor short on time for a team-building and morale-boosting dinner. (and drink session) Never before and not yet since, have I had a better boss or person I wanted to work with again. Someday you will know what it’s like to want to work for someone, just because of who that person is – it is a rare gem indeed when you have that opportunity in your career. Think of it like playing with your best friend – you always want to be on the same team when you play sports, right?
After we worked together for about a year and half, we remained friends. Although we were separated by a few oceans and continents, we did stay in touch, and whenever his travels took him to where I was, he always made time to meet. Same for me – I remember a few years before you were born, I was able to make a trip to London and I visited your Mom and Dad. I remember him taking me for a ‘ride’ in his super-cool sports car in the middle of the city – I thought, ‘how can someone drive like this through Notting Hill? Doesn’t everyone just walk or take a cab or the tube?’. Not your Dad – he did like to get around in style.
Chris was the reason I met my wife, Mimi. It was my birthday, March 2005, and Chris was visiting our Tokyo office, where I was based. He chose the place to go and we bumped into one of my friends who happened to be there. That friend introduced me to his friend, who later became my wife. You Dad was always the ‘social hub’. He joined my wedding in 2006 in my hometown of Vancouver, Canada (your Mom can show you where that is too!). When we asked those in the room who had traveled the farthest, you Dad came out the winner. Our only true ‘Brit’ attendee in a truly Canadian wedding party – a very diverse and colorful group. Chris and my best friend from Kindergarten were the last ones standing at the end the party. He even danced with my now sister-in-law – she said she was lucky to dance with the guy from farthest away.
Over the years, we talked about our careers, our marriages, and eventually being Dads. My son, Justin, was born only a few months after you. He is now 5 1/2 years old. Your Dad and I would talk via Skype occasionally, especially after you were just born. It’s not easy learning about how to take care of a little guy, but your Dad talked with a shine in his eye when he talked about how awesome it was to be ‘Daddy.’ When Justin was born, Chris became my ‘expert’ advisor – he told me, this one time, when Justin was not sleeping very well, that things would get better (which, of course, it did). Our family was living in Singapore then (my wife and I were not from there) and just that familiar, kind voice across the world re-assuring me that I wasn’t alone in my parental challenges helped a lot. I’m sure your Mom knows, when you’re not in your own country, it really helps to have a friendly global support network to keep you company.
Jude, I know some of this stuff might not feel very relevant right now, but as the days go on, I hope it does. I just wanted to know how much I thought of your Dad, how much I miss him (I think about him and you guys a lot), and how lucky he was to have had you and your Mom in his life. His memory will live on forever, and as you get older, I hope some of the stories from his friends and family will travel with you, wherever you are.
I hope you have a wonderful 2017, and Justin, Mimi, and I are thinking of you guys from across the world.
Also, Justin has said that if we are ever in London, or if you are where we are (in Tokyo now), he would really love to meet you. He likes soccer, lego, dinosaurs, and dancing. Maybe you’d like to play together sometime!
Much love,
John, Mimi, and Justin Stark

Dear Chris , last Saturday August 27th 2016, Jerry and I (finally) got married at the church at the top of the hill from where you used to live. We knew you would’ve been there if you were still with us and you and we, would’ve so enjoyed being together. It was a very personal, intimate service and you would’ve loved Cheska, our dog as our ring bearer. That would have tickled you. We would have heard you singing All You Need Is Love, along with The Beatles and the rest of us, as we left the church. At our garden reception our pianist played Hey Jude just for you and Jerry and I raised our glass to you my friend. You were sadly missed. Wish you’d been there Chris. Xxxx

As I was thinking about what to write about all the good times I’ve had with Chris over the years and in our business travels, I realized it would be impossible to pick out just one. Chris was always ready with a smile, funny story or recommendation and always seemed to have a few friends to introduce you to in any city or country he was in. I’ve was fortunate to have great times with Chris in Canada, the US, Mexico, Singapore, Australia, London, Italy… and probably a few more places I can’t recall. How many people do you get to know in your life like that?
Dan

Dear Jude
I first met your Dad at University in Aston.
He immediately marked himself out in my mind as someone who was determined to be at the centre of everything and not to miss a thing.
This proved to be an enduring trait and your Dad was forever bemoaning the fact that he was double, triple or quadruple-booked. People wanted him with them and he wanted to be there – but there just weren’t enough Chris Elsmores to go around!
Whenever I heard that Chris was going to be at one of the many get-togethers we had since leaving University it always made me look forward to it even more. He was someone you wanted to be in the company of – as others have already said he was the life and soul.
The number of tributes to Chris from family, friends and colleagues is testament to the warmth, fun, laughter, generosity and light he brought wherever he was.
That’s why I’ll miss Chris, and why I’m writing these words with a lump in my throat, – but it’s also why I always smile when I think of him.
I guess Chris’s love of life is a lesson for all of us – including I hope for you too Jude. Don’t just have a life….live a life as fully and as completely as you can.
My love and thoughts to you and your Mum.

Hello Jude, you are one special child. The apple of your Dad’s eye and much, much loved by him. Here’s your father at my birthday party with my husband and his brother. We loved your Dad. We met him when he moved into the house opposite us in Camberley and became our neighbour. The day he moved in he came to say hello and stayed for five hours, we all got on so well. I got him two cats soon afterwards, Fibber and Charlie and Chris had such a big heart that despite only wanting one- he took on two rescued homeless brothers who couldn’t be seperated. We laughed til we cried on many occasions together and you should know by now from all the other posts here, that Chris was a brilliantly funny storey teller and things that were hilarious, just kept happening to him. Our favourites were the time he scalded a friend at Unni, on the back of his hand, by touching him with a teaspoon he had just stirred his hot tea with. In shock the hand knocked the teaspoon flying into someone’s face and knocked their front tooth out, a tooth that your Dad had to pay for! ..a practical joke gone wrong but so funny in the re-telling.
The the time he hugged the bride in the wedding line up and spilled a whole pint of beer down the back of her wedding dress……(apologies if said bride reads this but it’s a true classic). He loved my stories about passengers on my flights and always wanted to hear them….being such a traveller himself. For my party, I sent your Dad a message saying I needed someone to stay up all night with me and watch the sunrise with….and I got back “I am that man!” Bless Chris.
We can’t believe we will not sit down together again in this world. This has hit us all hard Jude, your poor Mum and you most of all. Jerry and I have been so upset by this loss. …Jude, for your Dad…..we are here for you….always, Regan and Jerry. Xxxxxx

Dear Jude,
Unfortunately, we’ve never met, but I (like many of the people that have posted on this site) first met Chris at Aston University in 1988. We were on the same engineering course and became good friends almost immediately. We used to buddy up for coursework and we both worked for Shell in Chester for our industrial placement year (where we shared a house). We were given the nicknames “White Bread” and “Brown Bread” as we were the “sandwich” students!

As I’m sure you’ve gathered from all the other memoirs, time spend with Chris was always incredibly exciting, fun and spontaneous. I’ll never forget a very drunken weekend in Stoke where I think I learnt every rude Stoke FC song there was. We ended up staying with your great-granddad which was another unforgettable experience. Then there was the day he went out to buy a pot plant and came back with a computer (which in 1988 was a rare thing). I also will never forget a weekend spent in a static caravan in north Wales where he tried to teach me to say “Axminster carpets” while burping. And another day where we spent more than 8 hours changing the car horn on a red fiat panda that he had borrowed from your granddad. In fact, (as everyone has testified) most of the times spent with Chris were unforgettable. There are so many stories (not all involving alcohol), but most of them will have to wait until you’re older!

Hi Jude,

I met Chris about 12 years ago, while I was living in Sydney and he was based out of Singapore and we both worked for Business Objects. I don’t remember the day we met, but I do know that there wasn’t a visit to Sydney after, that we didn’t go out and do something fun together. Chris loved connecting people. He was a mingler that’s for sure! I’ve met some great people through Chris, including Adrian, Nick, Karen and Julian, and of course, your mum, Simone. Chris was so good at staying in touch – phone, skype, in person. Your dad was a very good friend, and wherever we moved to in the world, he was always there for me if I needed him.

Hi Jude & Simone
It’s so difficult to know where to start to describe Chris! His sense of fun and mischief are well known to all his friends many of whom have already described so many of those adventures enjoyed with him. We all have many more stories to share but I will now try and share those that stand out in my memory, but I look forward to sharing many more with you in person, as you grow up……

As with everyone that has posted here, your Dad and I were great friends and over the years have gotten into many scrapes together but the thing I will always remember is his legendary ability to connect people and just how very kind he was to everyone….always. There are few better lessons for any of us to learn.

Hi Jude, like many have mentioned already, it’s been really difficult to put ‘pen to paper’ about your wonderful, warm, one-of-a-kind, father, but I’ll try my best.

I met your dad when we were both at Business Objects. Chris was part of my global Alliance team leading our EMEA organization. From the moment I met Chris I liked him – he was smart, funny, successful and our business partners LOVED him. In business it’s important to work hard, bring value and know what your’e doing, but it’s also important to build relationships and Chris was phenomenal at that. The best I’ve ever worked with and the most impressive thing was that he was so genuine and that’s why everyone loved working with him.

Dear Jude,
It’s Doctor Fi here and I have been struggling to put into words how utterly devastated I am about your Dad being taken away from us so young. I sincerely wish I could have prevented it. He was a brave, kind, generous, funny guy who, as you can tell from all these posts, was loved by everyone and loved you and your mum very, very much.
Life is so unfair and I wish he was still around to take you to the park and give you big hugs and watch you grow up. What I think you can take away from this is that your Dad was an utter gentleman and a seriously cool man with a very deep heart. He will always win the ‘best fancy dress prize’, in my eyes, and the ‘funniest stories prize’ too – one I heard about a skiing holiday and a prize he won on several days made me cry with laughter!
I hope we can all tell you loads more fantastic stories over the years- I have a few good ones about your mum as well who was my ‘pasture’ buddy one night in Hampshire! Let’s get the roof down on the car soon and don’t press the red button….
Love Fi xxxx

Hi Jude,
Tesser here. What fun we had!! We all loved Chris …
I met your Mum when she moved to London and thankfully moved in with my friend Sarah Lafferty in St Stephens Gardens on the strength of Sarah’s ad in Time Out magazine. Their signature colour was red!
I met your Dad when he arrived on the scene shortly after Alexei Leveneintroduced him to your Mum and saw their relationship and love deepen.
I was at Chris’s 40th when he proposed to Simone, at their New Yearwedding, at the concert in Hyde Park when your Mum was expecting you and Sir Paul McCartney sang ‘Hey Jude’ and saw the joy your arrival brought.
Your Dad was one of the funniest, kindest, most empathic and warm men I’ve ever met. He lived large, always had fun on the way, loved a party and was an incredibly loyal generous friend who would go out of his way to help.
He could laugh at anything, most often himself, and certainly had plenty of material!! His self-deprecating humour, however often hid his intelligence and deep insight into people which was one of his biggest skills.
These pictures were taken at your Dad’s first Notting Hill carnival at our favourite sound system – KCC and the Rocking Crew. Your Mum and Dad always used to go away to avoid being besieged by revellers, but you could tell Chris had a hankering to revel and we finally managed to convince him to come one year, wasn’t too hard!!
That’s Nick Evans in the photo of the two of them with your Dad sporting my white shades. The group from left to right is me, my sailing friend Lindsay, Nick, your Dad and Crispin Gordon.
We had a blast and we adored Chris, much as we adore you and your Mum. I loved our dance party, I can see where you get it from,
Big love,
TxXx

Well I’ve been struggling for weeks now to think of the words to talk about Chris. Where do you start? I’ve been so moved to see how widely loved he is across the globe with some fabulous stories here and at the funeral. But if I don’t do it now I never will so here goes!
I first met Chris in my 2nd year at uni. He was part of a big group of friends who came back for their final year after placement. Rach, Annabelle and I soon became great friends with them all and there were many ridiculously funny nights at The Guild or at our house. Chris was always at the heart of all the fun but always there to look after us too! So many stories that like everyone else I can’t possibly share here!!!
After uni everyone went their separate ways but there were lots of parties and weddings which brought everyone together with lots more fun to be had.
Then as the years passed living “up north” means I’ve had less contact with the group as a whole but Chris always kept in touch. Rach and I had a fabulous few days in San Francisco with Chris, Simone and Jude and it was great to see such a happy family. Even then there was a story as Chris managed to get stopped by the Highway Patrol as he took Rach and I on a tour of the vineyards in the Napa Valley!
Chris was a fabulous friend to so many people including me as all these stories show. He always had time for everyone. Chris and I have adjacent birthdays of the 26th and 27th September so we would always email every year and catch up. My one regret is that I didn’t take his invite up to get a visit in the diary as I had so much going on!
Going to Chris’ funeral was such a mix of emotions. Devastatingly sad to say goodbye but so lovely to have a mini Aston reunion! It was great to catch up so many people who haven’t changed at all (well not much!) in the 15 years or more since I’ve last seen them. The Aston crowd should be proud of themselves that they still are such good friends after all this time and keep in such regular contact. They all did their beloved friend proud on the day and am sure will continue to keep his memory alive.
I hope that the promises made that day to get a date this year for the wider group to get together do happen. It would be so good to have a happier occasion in which to raise a glass to our friend Chris.
I still can’t believe you are gone but will forever remember the love and hugs and friendship xxx

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Hi Jude, we have met a couple of times, the first time with you and your Dad when you were only a baby (a big baby mind you) and then more recently for lunch with your Mum and Dad when you also met Flávia, my wife.

I first met your Dad when we worked at Business Objects and within minutes of meeting him, I knew I would enjoy working with him and only a few hours later when we were in the pub I knew we would also be good friends. Your Dad was a warm, friendly, funny and smart guy and it’s no surprise to hear and see the huge number of stories and memories shared from people who loved him. He, in turn, had lots of love for his friends but it was no secret that you and your Mum were absolutely top of his list.

You’re already showing a lot of similarities to your Dad and if you continue to take after him when it comes to dealing with people, this will stand you in good stead throughout life. One word of warning, your Dad did have a dodgy taste in shirts sometimes, so try to keep that in check. wink emoticon

A small example of your Dad and his typical generosity.
I was abruptly woken, one Saturday morning, on my birthday to boot, by my phone ringing. Who in the name of the wee man is waking me at 7.30am on my birthday? I thought.
Guess who? Only your Dad! “MATE! How’s it going? Do you fancy a hospitality ticket to the Rugby this afternoon at Twickenham” Wow, fantastic offer. I was sorely tempted to say yes, as I knew a day out with your Dad at the rugby would have been a great day and memorable for some reason, no doubt! However, in my still half-asleep state, I thanked your Dad profusely for his kind offer but told him that Flávia, my wife, (I’ll tell you another time the story about the day you met Flávia!) had lots of plans for me starting with early evening dinner, then the theatre and afterwards some drinks. So I thanked your Dad and went back to bed around 7.40am. I was just about to doze off again when the phone rang again. I missed it this time as I had left it in the other room, I got up and saw that your Dad had phoned again! I called him back and got his voicemail, he was leaving me a voicemail. So I waited a minute and phoned again. “Hey Mate, I just realised it was your birthday! Happy Birthday, Have a great day.” Ha!
So I was originally thinking your Dad was offering me the ticket because it was my birthday (which was nice enough) but no, he was just offering me the ticket because he had thought of me! He was a wee bit special your Dad.

Below I have added some photos from a Business Objects sports day where your Dad fully participated. He was never afraid to act the fool! Dodgy black curly hair, fat suit, growling while holding a blue cushion? and then just splashing about. Then a few years later, a photo from a friend’s birthday party that for me kind of sums your Dad up. So he’s on a night out with friends, he’s with his soul mate, your Mum, he’s a tad tipsy, he’s singing, he’s dancing but best of all he has a big lump of a bandage on his recently self-sliced thumb! Ask your Mum to tell you the story, Jude.

Looking forward to seeing you and your Mum soon and I’ll tell you a few more stories.

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Hi Jude,
your Dad was my oldest friend. We met in the 70’s when we lived in Forsbrook and I was lucky enough to stay close to him for the next 40 years. There are so many stories shared with you on this site by other close friends and I won’t repeat them … but needless to say you can see Dad played a big part in the big stories of our lives. He was a wonderful man .. Kind, funny, loyal, honest and hardworking .. And always with a huge smile. He was immensely proud of Mum and you, loved you both very much and spoke about you always.

I miss him dearly but like everyone else feel honoured to have called him a close friend.

Mark xx

Dear Jude,

Less than a year ago you were at our wedding with your mum and dad. We never imagined that it would be the last time we would see your dad, and that within a few months, at your young age, you would have to part with him.
But remember that your dad will be with you always.
He is in your heart.
He is watching over you, and as you grow he will continue to grow with you and within you.
We wish you and your mum much strength in the coming time, coming to terms with your loss and remembering your dad as he was.
Live your life as you know he would have liked you too: Fully, generously, with a lot of joy and with no regrets. Giving you a big hug and hoping to see you soon. Annalisa, Enting and Olivia

It is hard to believe that it has been over a month since the funeral. Chris is often in my mind, and probably always will be. It will soon be time to start creating the book for Jude, so please keep you stories, photos and memories coming in. All the stories I have received are now on the site, if you wish to add to or amend your entry, please use the form on the homepage or add a new entry on the Facebook group.

If you have used photographs, I may need higher resolution versions for printing, I’ll be back with more details on that later.

Hello Jude, you are one special child. The apple of your Dad’s eye and much, much loved by him. Here’s your father at my birthday party with my husband and his brother. We loved your Dad. We met him when he moved into the house opposite us in Camberley and became our neighbour. The day he moved in he came to say hello and stayed for five hours, we all got on so well. I got him two cats soon afterwards, Fibber and Charlie and Chris had such a big heart that despite only wanting one- he took on two rescued homeless brothers who couldn’t be seperated. We laughed til we cried on many occasions together and you should know by now from all the other posts here, that Chris was a brilliantly funny storey teller and things that were hilarious, just kept happening to him. Our favourites were the time he scalded a friend at Unni, on the back of his hand, by touching him with a teaspoon he had just stirred his hot tea with. In shock the hand knocked the teaspoon flying into someone’s face and knocked their front tooth out, a tooth that your Dad had to pay for! ..a practical joke gone wrong but so funny in the re-telling.
The the time he hugged the bride in the wedding line up and spilled a whole pint of beer down the back of her wedding dress……(apologies if said bride reads this but it’s a true classic). He loved my stories about passengers on my flights and always wanted to hear them….being such a traveller himself. For my party, I sent your Dad a message saying I needed someone to stay up all night with me and watch the sunrise with….and I got back “I am that man!” Bless Chris.
We can’t believe we will not sit down together again in this world. This has hit us all hard Jude, your poor Mum and you most of all. Jerry and I have been so upset by this loss. …Jude, for your Dad…..we are here for you….always, Regan and Jerry. Xxxxxx

Dear Jude.
I first met your Dad when we both worked together at Business Objects. Though we were not part of the same team, whenever our paths crossed he was always smiling and up for some banter about anything and nothing. This made me smile in return. Only a small example of your Dad’s positive effect on the people he came into contact with but one that I will remember.
The suddenness of your Dad’s leaving us was a shock. It has reminded me of the importance of my wife, daughters, family and friends in my life. It even prompted me to tell my best friend that ‘I was so pleased he was part of my life’, which I would never have done before.
Your Dad’s passing has also reminded me that ‘carpe diem’ is the best way to live life. RIP Chris. Gone but never to be forgotten.

Smiled when I came across this photo from a few summers ago whenSimone Barry, Chris Elsmore and Jude invited me over for a visit and play at their condo in Orlando! I remember Jude loving all the bubbles!

Dear Jude

A little story here….

Brian first met Chris at Business Objects, and struck up an immediate friendship that lasted the test of time, work and continents.

Chris was an amazing friend to link up with and relax in great company through the many friends and colleagues we have in the technology industry. Whether in Asia, US or in fact anywhere in the World, Chris always made time to meet up, give recommendations, and enjoy the moment. This picture shows Chris conquering Russia, although perishing cold weather, he had to resort to a warm trooper cap, very fetching!

Nicole met with Chris when she was starting her own business, we always remain so grateful to the long term contract he gave Nicole to help him expand the global alliance and partner strategy at Guidewire, a testament to his incredible warmth and generosity as a business leader, and human being. This helped Nicole establish both Chris’s needs to build his business, whilst growing her own start-up.

We will always keep Chris in our hearts as a great man, friend and comrade in any situation

Hey Jude, after my earlier edited post of one of Lennon & McCartney’s finest, I thought I ought to post my memory of your father.

We met when we worked together at i2 between 2000 and 2003 and remained firm friends working together on many occasions afterwards. We were due to have a drink before his last trip, but sadly work got in the way – One of life’s great regrets.

As many people have already said your Dad really was the life and soul of any party, if there was ever a group laughing heartily, you could guarantee that your Dad was always the middle of it.

We spent many nights until the wee small hours in Dallas, Barcelona, Windsor, Central London, Boats on the Thames at Henley, or wandering the streets of his beloved Notting Hill (which we all found strange for a lad from Stoke) roaming from bar to bar, just decompressing after a long day.

In life there are many events that you will remember well – learning to drive, going to university, getting a degree, your first job, getting married, the birth of your children – but in the middle of all of this there are global events which become characterised as “where were you?” moments. For your grandparents it was JFK in November 63, for your Mum and Dad is was Princess Diana in August 97, but there was another global event that bonded your Dad and I together.

On a bright sunny September morning in 2001 we boarded a plane to fly to a meeting with some consultants at Deloitte’s in Stuttgart. We arrived to find an airport packed with people for the Stuttgart Motorshow but despite being petrol-heads we duly headed off for the planned meeting – So far so good. But our return journey was rather more eventful. We jumped into a taxi mid-afternoon and the German driver in very poor English was trying to explain that a plane had flown into a building in New York. We both thought a little Cessna or something, but the full magnitude didn’t hit us until we walked into the airport to find all the screens showing live TV, just as the second plane struck the second tower.

We found an airport on complete lock down, nobody allowed to check in, nothing taking off. We spent the next 3-4 hours trying to find hotels rooms – nothing available, it was the Stuttgart Motorshow – trying to hire a car, but neither of us had our licenses (never travel anywhere without your driving license), get a train to the channel tunnel (which involved 7 changes and a 21 hour journey). So we decided to sit tight in an increasingly crowded airport. After a 5 hour wait we were eventually checked in and a further 3 hours in and out of the BA lounge (more out than in – it was packed) we eventually boarded a most uneventful flight home, other than every passenger carefully watching every other passenger.

So when the question arises “Where were you on September the 11th 2001?” I always say I was with Chris Elsmore, enjoying his company, in Stuttgart Airport waiting for a plane, feeling slightly anxious.

After this event we both developed a healthy scepticism of flying – it didn’t stop either of us continuing to globe-trot but it did create a cautiousness in 2 lads from the Midlands; it turned both of us into people watchers and never complaining about increased security precautions.

There were many other experiences, but one which sticks in the mind, was your Dad’s leaving doo when he left i2 to join Business Objects. It was a usual pub crawl around Windsor ending with 20-30 people in a Mexican restaurant somewhere under the station (I doubt I could ever find it again). Unbeknown to everyone else this coincided with another life event for your Dad (which is best covered in another discussion) but it was a great night out with far too many jugs of double strength Margarita, a real party atmosphere and characterised by your Dad’s magnanimous and generous nature when he paid the bill, point blank refusing to let anyone else contribute. But that was the mark of the man – the Life and Soul, Generous to a fault, always happy even in the most challenging of circumstances.

He will be very sadly missed by all, he has thousands of contacts around the world many of them are shared with many of his friends on this Facebook page but many are not on Facebook. I will share more from them with you on a separate contribution. Your Dad epitomised the world of collaboration and lived the concept of “any friend of yours is a friend of mine”, welcoming everyone with open arms!

Dear Jude,
Suyog and I got to know your dad in 2006/7, when we were in London to pursue our studies. In fact we had just started dating, and meeting your mum and dad was an important event for us! We looked up to your parents and, still being students, we felt somewhat like kids in front of them. However your dad had an art to make everyone feel respected, included and accepted – and that he did with us. He was a great listener and his confident caring personality meant many came to him to seek personal guidance. In fact, he played an important part in the first stages of Suyog becoming a part of the De Jong-Bianchessi family. Over the years that we lived in London, your parents invited us several times for parties and social events – your dad would always make sure everyone was taken care of, felt welcomed, and was having a good time. Every visit brought us closer to your mum and dad. The ease with which he made people feel comfortable, later translated into Suyog regularly seeking career-related advice from him, and I know how much that meant to him, but as I said this was also one of the first contacts that Suyog established within the extended family. I think they had a special bond. This meant a lot to me too. And the relation with both of your parents grew from there. Your mum and dad were adventurous and came to both of our weddings, one in Italy and the second in India. I can tell you that even in India your dad’s charm had its effect – his good nature was visible, and helped to overcome cultural barriers that may have held back some of the other wedding guests. And it turns out that Indian weddings involve numerous rituals, one of them being that a special moment is taken for the brother of the bride to remind the groom to take good care of his wife as they embark on a new life together. As I don’t have a brother, your dad happily took on that role and as you can see in this photo, he pulled Suyog’s ear, and I still remember him jokingly saying “Be careful now, take care of Cristina – I am watching you..!”. I am so glad that your dad took on this symbolic role on such an important day for us, and he has since then been like “our elder brother”, someone who (together with your mum) we felt looked after us, had wisdom to share when we needed advice, and was always a delight to be around. After your arrival I remember how happy and proud your mum and dad were. We regularly kept in touch during family occasions and holidays in Italy. We felt immediately reconnected each time we saw them- no matter how many months had passed. We treasure these memories, and will always think of your dad’s cheerful, generous and encouraging approach when facing the big and small challenges in life.
Jude, this is what we want to tell you: your dad loved you more than any dad possibly could. A part of him lives inside you. You know you have a family with us – Suyog, Cristina and your little sister Alicia. Just like your parents were our family bond in London, remember you have a family in Washington, D.C. We are here for you at all times. Lots of love, Cristina (Tina) and Suyog (Pog)

Dear Jude, we, aunt Marijke and uncle Pietro, were very fond of your daddy, Chris. From the day your mum brought him to a family reunion in Holland, we got off very well with him. Over the years he brightened up our daughters’ wedding parties, and we especially remember when your parents had come to India and Chris, dressed with a traditional turbant, participated in the Hindu ceremony playing the role of Cristina’s older brother. We also remember with joy the time the three of you came to stay with us for a couple of days in Barga. We even adopted a phrase that you and your daddy shouted when entering our door: “WE’RE HOME!”; this phrase has since become a standard part of our “family jargon”. We love you and your mummy very much, and we hope you’ll continue to come and visit us in the future. Marijke and Pietro from Luxembourg.

Dear Jude

We have known your mum and dad for a number of years. Many a club trip was enjoyed and we became firm friends. We stayed at your place having attended a James Bond Evening and your mum and dad have come to stay with us at sleepy Kettering. A good time was had by all. Your dad used to do this particular movement when we danced and thought no-one was watching him – we renamed it the “shoulder shuffle” a dance your dad created. Your mum will demonstrate further to get the full effect. We hope this memory will make you smile as it does us when we recall the story. With our love to you both, Zoe and John

Dear Jude,

One of my favorite memories of my whole life was with your Dad (and Mom) watching Paul McCartney in Hyde Park, and listening to Hey Jude. Your Mom was pregnant with you at the time, and I think about this memory every time I hear that song. Not sure I’ll be able to attend those concerts again without your Dad – it was an annual tradition, and just wouldn’t be the same.

Your Dad was very special. He had a way of making every moment a fond memory, and making every person feel like a favorite friend. I met your parents on a group ski trip (another favorite memory) with Elaine Bowers Coventry, Garth Coventry, Susan Orr Morris, Erin Walsh, and others and we became instant friends. Over the years, your parents have been generous hosts to me in both their San Francisco and London homes. But most importantly, they’ve been true friends. Always listening and understanding, during good times and bad. I will miss the long and deep conversations with your Dad, as he was the type of person who would always listen, without judgement, and then turn bad thoughts into good times.

Jude –

I met your Mom & Dad through a very close friend, Erin Walsh; probably Aunt Ernie to you. Over the years, your dad become a dear friend whom I truly loved.

Chris was a global citizen and like many of his relationships – we had a global friendship that journeyed across continents and well over a decade. I consider myself blessed to have had Chris in my life, even for a short while. Its been said again and again, he was a good man, a great friend and he lived his life well.

Jude, I met your dad over 4,600 days ago, which in itself is a very very long time indeed, and as has been echoed by virtually everyone who knows your dad he has touched many peoples lives, in a good way, usually involving laughter and a few jars of ale (which you will grow into – i am sure of that) as you follow in your dads footsteps. Your dad will be with all of us always through these stories that we share with you and one another as we celebrate and remember a truly amazing person – friend, colleague, husband and daddy. Did you know that your dad has an amazing ability to maintain a smile even when the grape bends most men to a horizontal position, which i experienced with him on many an occasion. This coupled with his love of cars through the petrol sloshing between his ears underpins why he is loved by many and will remain part of our lives through his kind words/wisdom and support as our lives bounced into and off one another. Speaking of wise words, when he got his 911 he was very proud of the fact that there was more leaves covering his porker than on the road from the autumnal fall due to his inability to drive it – man he loved that car! But your dad was even more proud and bursting with love when he told me that you were on your way into this world, and it is in this world that we all call home that you will shine with the support of your mum and all of us. When you get the book bug, I urge you to read ‘footprints in the sand’ by Mary Stevenson, as this is how i see your dad looking down and over you as you grow day by day…

Dear Jude:
I met your father when we were colleagues at i2 Technologies, and remained friends ever since. Even though we moved on in our careers and I even moved to Switzerland for a time, I flew back to London on the occasion of his 40th birthday. The party was an epic one, culminating in your father proposing to your mother in a heartfelt manner surrounded by his family and friends. In recent years we both became fathers late in life and in our busy lives we spent more time with work and family. Your birthday parties and our children’s have been welcome reunions with you and your family and I hope that will continue and deepen. Chris was a beam of light to all he touched and we will all miss him. He taught us to enjoy life and there is no more important lesson.

Hey Jude, after my earlier edited post of one of Lennon & McCartney’s finest, I thought I ought to post my memory of your father.

We met when we worked together at i2 between 2000 and 2003 and remained firm friends working together on many occasions afterwards. We were due to have a drink before his last trip, but sadly work got in the way – One of life’s great regrets.

As many people have already said your Dad really was the life and soul of any party, if there was ever a group laughing heartily, you could guarantee that your Dad was always the middle of it.

We spent many nights until the wee small hours in Dallas, Barcelona, Windsor, Central London, Boats on the Thames at Henley, or wandering the streets of his beloved Notting Hill (which we all found strange for a lad from Stoke) roaming from bar to bar, just decompressing after a long day.

In life there are many events that you will remember well – learning to drive, going to university, getting a degree, your first job, getting married, the birth of your children – but in the middle of all of this there are global events which become characterised as “where were you?” moments. For your grandparents it was JFK in November 63, for your Mum and Dad is was Princess Diana in August 97, but there was another global event that bonded your Dad and I together.

On a bright sunny September morning in 2001 we boarded a plane to fly to a meeting with some consultants at Deloitte’s in Stuttgart. We arrived to find an airport packed with people for the Stuttgart Motorshow but despite being petrol-heads we duly headed off for the planned meeting – So far so good. But our return journey was rather more eventful. We jumped into a taxi mid-afternoon and the German driver in very poor English was trying to explain that a plane had flown into a building in New York. We both thought a little Cessna or something, but the full magnitude didn’t hit us until we walked into the airport to find all the screens showing live TV, just as the second plane struck the second tower.

We found an airport on complete lock down, nobody allowed to check in, nothing taking off. We spent the next 3-4 hours trying to find hotels rooms – nothing available, it was the Stuttgart Motorshow – trying to hire a car, but neither of us had our licenses (never travel anywhere without your driving license), get a train to the channel tunnel (which involved 7 changes and a 21 hour journey). So we decided to sit tight in an increasingly crowded airport. After a 5 hour wait we were eventually checked in and a further 3 hours in and out of the BA lounge (more out than in – it was packed) we eventually boarded a most uneventful flight home, other than every passenger carefully watching every other passenger.

So when the question arises “Where were you on September the 11th 2001?” I always say I was with Chris Elsmore, enjoying his company, in Stuttgart Airport waiting for a plane, feeling slightly anxious.

After this event we both developed a healthy scepticism of flying – it didn’t stop either of us continuing to globe-trot but it did create a cautiousness in 2 lads from the Midlands; it turned both of us into people watchers and never complaining about increased security precautions.

There were many other experiences, but one which sticks in the mind, was your Dad’s leaving doo when he left i2 to join Business Objects. It was a usual pub crawl around Windsor ending with 20-30 people in a Mexican restaurant somewhere under the station (I doubt I could ever find it again). Unbeknown to everyone else this coincided with another life event for your Dad (which is best covered in another discussion) but it was a great night out with far too many jugs of double strength Margarita, a real party atmosphere and characterised by your Dad’s magnanimous and generous nature when he paid the bill, point blank refusing to let anyone else contribute. But that was the mark of the man – the Life and Soul, Generous to a fault, always happy even in the most challenging of circumstances.

He will be very sadly missed by all, he has thousands of contacts around the world many of them are shared with many of his friends on this Facebook page but many are not on Facebook. I will share more from them with you on a separate contribution. Your Dad epitomised the world of collaboration and lived the concept of “any friend of yours is a friend of mine”, welcoming everyone with open arms!

Jude,

The pictures will follow. I waited and waited to post this as I still can not believe we are where we are. For starters, I’ve know your father for over 15 years which is 1/3 of my life and 1/2 of my adult life. We communicated regularly and always loved, laughed and enjoyed life. Over the past 5 years most of those stories and fun times were about you (and my daughter) as you both know one another and she adores you. I love your fez hat, the outfits and your smiles.

Jude

So much of what I have to say about your Dad has already been said many times over. We met at Business Objects – and it turned out we lived in the same town at the time….which gave the perfect opportunity to start a ‘curry club’ on a Monday night. we hadn’t seen each other for a while, but I have many fond memories of the times we spent together. Your mum and dad came to our wedding in 2006 (you can see an early photo bomb from a man called Darren Hilton).

In the words of your dad ‘You can never have too many pairs of sunglasses mate’

Hi Jude,

Many of us were lucky enough to share some of your Dad’s life. I first met him around 20 years ago soon after University – we were all finding our way at that time. We shared many weekends away, golf trips (definitely not his finest attribute but he made up for that with the “team bonding”), Birthday parties, Stag trips, Weddings and lots more. He always had a smile on his face. It was a pleasure to have him around and I feel priviliged to have known him over all these years.

Hey, Jude,
Like so many people here, I first met your Dad through work, but over time, his natural qualities and due to our mutual ‘don’t take life too seriously’ attitude created a good friendship. His many personal qualities have been described time and time again, but it is true – easy and open, straight forward, caring, kind, (lots and lots of) fun, considerate, and always generous with his time and advice. Above all, you always knew he was on your side, and would help in the best way he could (what many would describe as selfless).

Dear Simone and Jude,
Chris always brought people together. Even now, he is still doing it. There are several of us in Vancouver that could not make it to London to celebrate his life with you today so we had our own remembrance here tonight.
There were many happy and funny stories told, a few tears shed and lots of love sent your way.
Our hearts and thoughts are with you both. xo

 

Hi Jude
I was fortunate enough to have known your dad for some 25 years since I met him at University through the football team. Although he wasn’t a footballer himself (I don’t think he could kick a ball!) he was everything else you could wish for in a team mate. He was loyal, honest, funny, always up for a few beers and good for a bit of banter! I can honestly say that your dad was one of the best guys you could meet and although I didn’t see as much of him after University years, whenever I did he would throw his arms around me, give me a big smile and say ‘maaate…how’s it going? When I brought myself into the 21st century and got onto Facebook a few years back, your dad was one of the first people to get in touch and it’s so apparent that the impact he made on his friends he met at uni was the same right across the world. I’ll always remember his posts to friends in San Francisco or the many other places he would go to on business making them aware that he was going to be around to meet up for a few beers. The many photos of your dad also showed how much he enjoyed life and being with you, your mum and friends. Although he won’t be around to see you grow up Jude, you should take comfort in the fact that your dad was one of the best and was truly loved and respected by those who were fortunate enough to have known him.

Hi Jude
I’ve just spent an emotional evening looking through some old photos of your Dad and it really brought home to me how many of the most memorable, and happiest days of my life, that I shared with him.
I met him on my first day of University and immediately we formed a close friendship. Over the years we would end up sharing a house, holidaying together, with a fair few parties sprinkled in between. Time spent with your Dad was always fun, he had a wonderful way of lighting up even the most mundane of occasions with his sense of humour (those laughter lines were made from many years of continual use!), his generosity of spirit and his huge appetite for life.
Your Dad was best man at my wedding in 2001 (he was responsible for getting me together with my wife but that’s another story!) and as you can see from the photo below he drove me to the Church in my Dad’s vintage car. Unfortunately on the way to the Church the car broke down and I began to panic. Your Dad, cool as anything said, “Don’t worry youth, hop in the driver’s side & I’ll push”. So resplendent in full morning suit, and grinning at the almost stationary traffic on both sides of the road, the boy from Stoke got me out of a hole!
As to what your Dad would want to pass on to you. Be kind, be thoughtful, don’t take yourself too seriously and take on his philosophy of “a friends friend is, by definition, your friend”.
I’ll miss your Dad more than I can say, but like everyone on this site I feel immensely privileged to have known him. Simply, he was the best mate anyone could ever wish for.
Pearty

Hi Jude, I first met your amazing dad in 1981 as a nervous 11 year old on my first day at Blythe Bridge High School. For the next few years we shared a classroom in almost every subject (not sure why, he was much cleverer than me !!)
Some say our maths teacher Mr “Jimmy” Maland installed the infamous angled mirror above his blackboard to keep an eye on a young and already very sociable Mr Elsmore !! Like Nobby (Rob Hannaby) I also endured many a cold Saturday morning cracking the ice on the odd rugby pitch with your dad prior to a probable defeat.
The Blythe lads holiday in Lloret de Mar in 1987 was legendary, as was the weekend spent at the student house in Stechford, Birmingham in 1990 where I recall his room was rather tastefully decorated with “souvenir” traffic cones and the odd flashing light. (The Young Ones had nothing on that place).
Through something of a lager induced haze, the house in Chester was next where a night on the town led to an indoor water fight !! To those who recall it, “Kagoul Man” will live long in the memory !
Probably the memory of him which makes me smile the most was in 2003 when a group of us went to Andy Shaw’s stag party in Barcelona. There, I was lucky enough to “room” with your dad along with Slinny (Pete Slinn). Your dad travelled alone and arrived ahead of the rest of us from Stoke. When me and Pete entered our room we were greeted by him punching the air wearing his trademark cheesy grin…….and a full Superman outfit with one very un-Superman like accessory attached !!? !! Brilliant !!
Regrettably I haven’t managed to catch up with your dad for a year or two now but through the magic of Facebook his beaming smile continued to shine out through my phone screen on a regular basis. I know he’d have greeted me like a brother had our paths crossed again …. that’s the kind of true gentleman that he was and thats the bloke I shall always remember fondly as an old, but hugely respected and now, tragically, much missed friend.
Keep smiling Jude, your dad always was !!
Rob Booth, Meir Park, Stoke on Trent.

Hi Jude, I first met you and your mom in Boston the spring of your second year. You likely don’t remember but we played hide & seek behind the big hotel curtains and caused quite a raucous! It was so fun because it wasn’t unlike the many times your dad and I got together.
Your dad and I started the same month at a company called Panopticon in September of 2009. We met a few weeks later in DC at a conference and immediately got on “like a house on fire”. As so many have communicated, your dad had a special gift for connecting with many different types of people and making everyone feel important.
Your dad eventually became my boss but more importantly a mentor and dear friend. I was so fortunate to learn from his business acumen, integrity and dedication on a professional level and his wit, humor and genuine love of life from a friend’s perspective.
We raised alot of raucous over the 4 years we worked together in Stockholm, Amsterdam, London, Las Vegas, Miami, NY & SF. Every event we attended, your dad knew so many people and was the person everyone wanted to be around-it was extraordinary and I am so thankful to have those memories! A good portion of my business network is a direct result of your dad which I’m proud to say is full of genuine people you will be able to tap into when your time comes. I am a better person for having known your dad and he made the world around him a better place-not many people have that legacy!
So to the first picture, this was an offsite in Stockholm, we worked for an eclectic company and one of our fun activities was to play segway polo (back when segways were new and cool). To put it in your dad’s words, we were “gobsmacked” about what to do so we made a bet about who could take the CEO down first…from there it became a smash up derby but in the end we together succeeded in our mission and giggled about it through the rest of the night.
Jude, you are his proudest accomplishment. I had the good fortune of being close when you were born. He was the proudest papa and sent so many incredible pictures of you with your mom. I will treasure knowing your dad and hope to know you as you grow up. The Redsox cap you have (if it still fits) came from me and we talked about taking you to a game when you came back to Boston so if you and your mom have the chance I’d love to still do that!
Sometimes heaven calls the most special people sooner that the rest of us want or understand…your dad was one of the best that for some reason was needed there earlier than any of us would have wanted.
He would certainly want you to carry on and become the amazing man you are destined to be….you have a truly extraordinary mom and legacy and I have no doubt you’ll do your dad proud!
With Love, Jen

Jude
As you will be able to tell from so many posts, your father was such a fun, caring, generous and loveable guy. So generous that his enthusiasm for life was contagious. He’s not just missed by those that knew him directly, but also by our significant others that found it so easy to get to know, and love, him.

In my particular case, we got to know each other working at BusinessObjects during the mid-2000s, and enjoyed numerous work trips together, as well as the boys Ski trips to St Anton. In fact I think he missed one of the ski trips because you were due to arrive “any day”, and I had to find a new roommate for that trip. At least the new roomie didn’t snore like your dad!!